The War On Christmas Is Over! (a “Poe’s Law” experiment)

Fahoo Fores Dahoo Dores
Welcome Christmas, Christmas Day!

I have never felt safe in this country as a white male until today.

Alas, I can say my favorite two words loud and proud: “Merry Christmas!” 

The war is over, the battle is won!

The tyranny of the libtards is over.

White people are finally free!

Thanks to President (Elect) Trump, we no longer need to live in fear.

Those dumb Jews in Hollywood and media can cry all they want. Sorry Anderson Cooper. Sorry Al Sharpton. Sorry Lena Dunham. No longer do I have to fake that “PC” bullshit. None of this “Happy Holidays” new age propaganda.

Globalization has been defeated!!

Freedom of speech is alive!

Now I can finally say:

• Fuck “X-mas.”
• Fuck Kwanzaa.
• Fuck Hanukkah.
• Fuck whatever the gays celebrate.
• And FUCK Starbucks.

Starting today, the ‘Red’ cups have been replaced:

White Jesus died for my sins. Now nobody can tell me otherwise.

We are His chosen people to preserve consumerism and capitalism!! 

Christmas lives! America lives!

THANK YOU Trump for your continued BRAVERY.

You are a true PATRIOT bb.

Because of Trump, I can enjoy these things on Christmas without being oppressed:

Hockey. Auntie Anns. Call Of Duty. my Maroon5 cd. TOMS. Eggnog. Pokémon GO. Horseback riding. Talk Radio. Shopping at the Gap. my 401k. Pinterest. Scrabble. Literal 7 day creation story. And being able to say stuff like, “black people can be racist too” without being shunned by society.

Trim up the tree with Christmas stuff
Like bingle balls, and whofoo fluff
Trim up the town with goowho gums
And bizilbix and wums…
Grab all the girls by the pussy!!

This weekend, let us celebrate the whitest Christmas our nation has ever seen.